EmptyInside (thelastbandito) wrote,

Klown[FU] = Meh

[17:25] [Klown[FU]] meh.
[17:25] [Klown[FU]] Being fucking bored is worse than being annoyed.
[17:26] [Ydrof] time go home
[17:27] [WldHoney] I wanna go
[17:27] [Ydrof] home?arent you already?
[17:27] [WldHoney] I didnt say home
[17:27] [WldHoney] I just said I wanna go
[17:28] [JaneEA-6B] Klown: sucker.
[17:34] [Klown[FU]] I think she wants to go to YOUR home.
[17:34] [Klown[FU]] and do, THINGS
[17:35] [Klown[FU]] Jane: Asshole.
[17:37] [JaneEA-6B] Klown: but, not enough of an asshole to make you log off again it seems.
[17:37] [Klown[FU]] Jane: No. I just want to stab you in the ass with a rusty railroad spike.
[17:37] [JaneEA-6B] Klown[FU]: and who doesnt
[17:37] [WldHoney] kinky
[17:39] [Klown[FU]] I want a big bag of money and a girlfriend.
[17:39] [Klown[FU]] Fuck. It apparently did not work.
[17:39] [Klown[FU]] It's been a little over 2 years since I had a serious relationship.
[17:39] [Klown[FU]] Fuck.
[17:40] [Klown[FU]] I guess that means it's about time to start looking again.
[17:40] [JaneEA-6B] why bother
[17:40] [Klown[FU]] Every few years or so, I have to find someone who's moderately attractive, and fuck them until I hate them or they hate me, and we part ways on terms of mutual loathing.
[17:40] [Klown[FU]] Actually, that's not true.
[17:41] [Klown[FU]] Usually we just dissolve the relationship on mutual terms.
[17:41] [Klown[FU]] But that's not dramatic.
[17:41] [Klown[FU]] Boy meets girl. Boy loses girl. Boy goes meh. just doesn't sell movies.
[17:43] [Klown[FU]] Jane, I'm appropriating you from bhab as my interim-girlfriend.
[17:43] [Klown[FU]] I need someone to clean me up, and provide 'competetion' to make me more attractive to the women who I really want to be my girlfriend.
[17:43] [WldHoney] buy a wedding ring
[17:44] [Klown[FU]] I believe that the good basis for a solid relationship is to start it out with one big fat lie.
[17:44] [JaneEA-6B] you'd have to see me in person though, and that would not amuse you
[17:44] [Klown[FU]] That way, no matter how many smaller lies you can tell, you can just reveal and then apologize for that big fat one, and it will have a cumulative effect with the little ones.
[17:44] [JaneEA-6B] because all the the annoyance and assholeness would be real
[17:44] [Klown[FU]] Yes, but I could also stab you in the ass with a rusty railroad spike for real.
[17:45] [Klown[FU]] And that would go a long way towards mitigating how much of an asshole you are.
[17:45] [JaneEA-6B] maybe you should borrow wld instead, she is way cuter
[17:45] [WldHoney] umm I sooo am not
[17:45] [JaneEA-6B] and shorter
[17:45] [WldHoney] shorter yes
[17:45] [JaneEA-6B] and the shorter thing is very important in certain situations
[17:46] [Klown[FU]] Okay, there's only one way to settle this then, it seems.
[17:46] [Klown[FU]] Naked jello wrestling. With chainsaws.
[17:46] [Klown[FU]] Winner will become my interim-girlfriend until I can find the true love of my life.
[17:46] [Klown[FU]] Loser will become an amputee, at the very least.
[17:46] [Klown[FU]] I think that's fair.
[17:46] * Klown[FU] nods sagely. *
[17:47] [WldHoney] ummmm no
[17:47] [JaneEA-6B] like, say you were taking a bus somewhere.. and then it fell off of a cliff and was smashed.. smashed so that there was only a very small opening to fit through in order to free you from the wreckage..
[17:47] [JaneEA-6B] if you chose me, you'd die.
[17:47] [WldHoney] I think YOU should compete for us!
[17:48] [Klown[FU]] Wld, I have no idea what concoction of crack and or cocaine you are smoking, but we've already firmly established that I'm a prime specimen of the male half of our species, and that any female would be lucky to have someone as awesome as me.
[17:48] [Klown[FU]] Now, on with the wrestling. I've got women to trick into dating me, and I'm a very busy guy here.
[17:48] [WldHoney] then why are single:-O?
[17:48] [WldHoney] I think I will drop out of that competition then
[17:49] [JaneEA-6B] Klown: it really seems like too much effort for me
[17:49] [Klown[FU]] Look, I'd kindly ask you to stop exposing every single little flaw in my logic here, otherwise, we're in for a looooooong day of nothing but, 'god your an idiot, Klown.' and that's just not high on my list of priorities.
[17:49] [Klown[FU]] So if you could just, you know, set your brain on the back burner for a while, and just go with the flow here. Yeah, that's the ticket.
[17:49] [WldHoney] besides I am a red head..and you KNOW what they say about them..you wouldnt want me anyway
[17:50] [Klown[FU]] Wrestling. Jello. Chainsaws. Naked. Chop-chop, we're on a schedule.
[17:50] [WldHoney] you first
[17:50] [Klown[FU]] Hey, I'm the creative genius that came up with this concept.
[17:50] [Klown[FU]] You can't expect me to concept, screenplay, write, direct, AND star in this escapade now.
[17:51] [JaneEA-6B] WldHoney: well, to tell the truth, im not sure what is said about red heads
[17:51] [WldHoney] welll several things but I was reffering to the temper
[17:51] [Klown[FU]] There's only so much awesome that I can contain in my body here, and I'm afraid you might be having delusions of just how much awesome any one man can be, if you think that's possible.
[17:51] [WldHoney] the other thing he would want so I wont mention it;-)
[17:51] [JaneEA-6B] ohhh
[17:51] [JaneEA-6B] do tell!
[17:52] [Klown[FU]] Red, Black, Blonde, Blue, Fuschia, Periwinkle, what matters here, is that we're already half an hour behind, and neither of you are naked, we have no jello, and if Sawyer's not back with the chainsaws in ten minutes, he's fired.
[17:52] [WldHoney] I am not saying any of them are true or anything...but they say..."red on the head fire in the bed" ;-)
[17:52] [JaneEA-6B] hrm
[17:53] [JaneEA-6B] the males of the variety tends to be drunks in my experience
[17:53] [WldHoney] yes
[17:53] [WldHoney] mine too
[17:53] [JaneEA-6B] maybe its linked
[17:53] [WldHoney] thats why I only dated one for an hour lol
[17:53] * Klown[FU] snaps fingers. *
[17:53] [Klown[FU]] Hey, hey. C'mon, focus. Is anyone even paying attention to me here.
[17:53] [Klown[FU]] Jesus.
[17:54] [Klown[FU]] The things I put up with these days.
[17:54] [JaneEA-6B] i knew a cute little drunken one, i should have gone for him and seen how it was
[17:54] [WldHoney] klown I am telling you...
[17:54] [WldHoney] get a wedding band
[17:54] [WldHoney] women cant resist those
[17:55] [Klown[FU]] Alright, you're both fired. Sawyer, you're fired too, wherever you are, so forget about the chainsaws, and get me a cappachino.
[17:56] [Klown[FU]] Okay, so if I'm not going to have an interim-girlfriend, to help me pull of an incredibly intricate ruse of moderately sub-epic proportions, I'm going to need a new plan.
[17:56] [WldHoney] im telling you!
[17:56] [WldHoney] wedding band!
[17:56] [WldHoney] or a cigarband lol
[17:57] [Klown[FU]] But being the supremely awesome thinker that I am, I'm prepared for that. I've already got another idea. I'm going to get a wedding band. In my experience, and believe me, I've got a lot of experience from all those hours of leveling up, in my experience, chicks dig married guys.
[17:57] [WldHoney] HELLO!
[17:57] [Klown[FU]] So, If I get a wedding band, and hang out in some social atmospheres, they should be crawling all over me in no time.
[17:57] [WldHoney] am I on ingore? lol
[17:57] [Klown[FU]] Awesome idea. I'm glad I thought of it.
[17:57] * WldHoney shakes her head
[17:57] [WldHoney] whatever big guy
[17:57] [Klown[FU]] Huh, what Wld? Look, I'm sorry, I don't speak spanish. No worries, it's okay. I think I got this covered.
[17:58] [WldHoney] ok
[17:58] [Klown[FU]] Yeah, like I said, Naked Jello Chainsaw Wrestling's off, I got a new plan. although, we could still make some good money on pay-per-view if you're interested.
[17:59] * Klown[FU] sighs.
[18:00] [WldHoney] um believe me..no one would pay to see me naked
[18:00] [Klown[FU]] Wld, I could put Boris Yeltsin and Sasquatch in a naked jello chainsaw deathmatch, and people would pay to see it.
[18:01] [Klown[FU]] I'm pretty sure you look better than both a Naked Boris Yeltsin, and Naked Sasquatch.
[18:01] [WldHoney] naw
[18:02] [Klown[FU]] Stop fishing for compliments, or I will begin agreeing with you.
[18:02] [WldHoney] please do
[18:02] [Klown[FU]] Ok. You're right Wld. No one would pay to see you naked.
[18:02] [WldHoney] how can I fish for compliments...if you havnt ever seen me you wouldnt know to say yes or no
[18:03] [WldHoney] I could be 300 lbs for all you know
[18:03] [Klown[FU]] You're a woman, it's in your nature to fish for compliments.
[18:03] [WldHoney] not online
[18:03] [Klown[FU]] That's where ALL women fish for compliments THE MOST!
[18:03] [WldHoney] not this one
[18:04] [Klown[FU]] Denying it only means it's true.
[18:04] [WldHoney] whatever you say
[18:04] [WldHoney] I just dont understand how someone can assume someone would say someone looks hot if someone hasnt seen the other person ever
[18:05] [Klown[FU]] It's called unwarranted flattery, and if you've never seen it, you have lead a sheltered life.

Now, either that's funny.

  • Post a new comment


    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

    Your IP address will be recorded